Another Season Has Begun

So, here we are in the midst of another Biggest Loser season and the competition looks good! I will not be competing against them this year however, as I have different goals set for myself this time around. Don't fear, I will still be commenting on the weeks work and who was voted off. :) My life has been quite interesting lately. I have a weigh in with James this Friday and I can't tell you how nervous I am for it. It would be such a disappointment if, after all the work I have put in, nothing has changed. I even had a nightmare today about it. I haven't been feeling that great today, so I took some medicine and had a nap. Well, in my dream I was a contestant on the biggest loser, James was my trainer, it was two days before the weigh in. They had a temptation challenge with ice cream, hamburgers, chips and dip, all the junk food you could possibly imagine and I went nuts! I ate so much I felt like my stomach was going to explode. Afterward, I sat there thinking that I only had two days to try and work all this off. Two days!! I woke up in a panic, before realizing that it was just a dream and I went and had a salad. :) It was actually pretty funny when usually I wake up that scared after a dream that I had died or something super tragic; but apparently my mind thinks that giving in to a temptation like that would be a tragedy. I also realized something in my most recent training session. Sometimes we say things to people that we don't think of as poignant, but to the other person they are. Well, James struck a cord with me on Friday and I have done a lot of thinking on the subject. I was at the grocery store, shopping for the week, when I noticed a little girl sitting in front of one of the stores displays. It was a cutesy display of a large Halloween snow globe; instead of snow had little bats flying around inside. This girl was just mesmerized by it. She had to have sat there 10 mins without moving just gazing at them. As I watched her and smiled at her fascination, I thought back on what had been said to me. Am I going through life just watching? Do I sit mesmerized by other people accomplishing their goals and pay no attention to mine? Or am I like the bats in that bubble, allowing my circumstances to dictate my path? I know it is a little deep, but going through this journey makes me take a deeper look at myself. It was actually a shock to realize that I do those things. I am limiting myself. There is no excuse for it, but I don't know how to break out. I am sure that some of you have felt this way before and I know I am not expressing myself very clearly, but it is hard to explain.
Anywhoo, the weigh in is Friday at around 4pm; please keep your fingers crossed that it will be great and I will do my part to make it AWESOME! Catch you all next week.

Milly